tangkap kawin - a tradition

an email came to my inbox early on monday. the subject: an invitation to an 'akad nikah'. curious, i clicked that open and was surprised by whom it was sent.

he asked me to have a permission for days off. the reason? he got to get married. yet, he sounded unexcited and dull. why didn't you feel excited, i asked. i was asked to marry my girlfriend not because that i wanted to get married, at least not now, he said. and, the conversations stopped. i then offered him a good luck for the life ahead.

then the email came.

in the middle of a modern society, there still lies the conservativeness of an eastern way of tradition called 'tangkap kawin'. rumors said, when the man got caught several time still dating his date beyond 10 pm in the evening things will get serious. the father of the girl will talk to him and ask him to marry his daughter to prevent the 'unthinkable' like the girl got pregnant or the family being chided by the neighbors.

the conversations would be like -- marry my daughter or stop seeing her.

ultimately, that's a tough choice to make.

he's still young. the future lies ahead in front of him. but now, he has to take care a wife.

at least, he saw a positive side out of it -- "pernikahan tuh bawa berkah, pak," he said, "nanti punya anak juga tambah lagi berkahnya," he continued.

bless your heart and your future.
photo taken by arisanti in lawrence, kansas